This year, say yes to saying no

If your inbox looks like mine, it’s full of requests and invitations. Each January brings a new batch of eager clients, exciting projects and easy-to-make commitments.

If you don’t learn to say “no” – frequently, politely and effectively – you’ll hit February overloaded and exhausted.

The good news is that the same technologies that threaten to overload you can also keep you sane. Here’s how I use my computer and social media networks as allies in the discipline of saying no:

Prioritise Your Commitments

Use a spreadsheet to list every project you’re working on. Create a column to assign a priority level to each project from 1 to 5. Then create another column to jot down the name of anyone who could take over or help with each project. Sort your projects according to priority, and set aside all but the top-priority items that can only be handled by you personally.

Streamline Your Online Communications

You may have 10 different communication channels (e-mail, text message, Facebook, etc.) that require processing on a daily (if not hourly) basis. Take a week in which you limit your online communications to a bare minimum. At the end of the week, close down your accounts on any networks that take more time than they’re worth, or edit your profile on those networks to tell people you prefer to be contacted by other means.

Make ‘No’ Your Default Answer

Plan on saying no to all new social network invitations, projects and events. Say yes only if the invitation or opportunity meets a short set of criteria. For example, I look for conferences that combine business development (getting clients), professional development (improving skills or knowledge) and personal development (regeneration or personal growth). I only attend events that promise meaningful value on at least two out of three of those fronts.

None of these practices will eliminate the anxiety that comes from saying no, or the fear that you may be passing up a fantastic opportunity. But it’s precisely because saying no is so difficult that we need tools and systems to help make it a little easier, and a little more habitual. The more you say no, the better you’ll perform when dealing with the important few projects that get a big yes.

Distributed by The New York Times Syndicate